This Christmas eve/Christmas was quite different from last year. The former was spent at my best friend's brother's reception. Indian clothes (sarees to be exact), vegetarian food and no alcohol. However, wait for it, it was fun. Also, I can safely conclude that I can dance to Bollywood music (somewhat) sober. And 'Subha Hone Na De'! I cannot stop humming it. Christmas last year was Fipi with Bollywood music and a new face I was kind of warming up to. This year, that face (not new anymore) and I went on a cute dinner date and ate till we couldn't breathe. Oh, and these people singing carols saw me get excited and clap like a seal and came and sang at our table. That was really funny. Thennn we went 10D and I ogled at the pretty wreaths, bells, glittery hangings etc.
Other than the absence of a larger than life Christmas tree, it was all perfect.

Trust my horoscope to be this apt.

Where's your holiday spirit, Gemini?  Aren't you looking forward to a joyful December and a Happy New Year? If you're feeling disillusioned because you aren't where you thought  you'd be this holiday season, you're certainly not alone. But instead of finding lots of reasons for feeling down, try to find a way to pull yourself out of the doldrums and enjoy this magical time of the year. If you concentrate on finding happiness, you will certainly find it. There is still time to perk up your attitude and get everything you want for Christmas.

I don't know what my problem is.
I can't figure out if it's to do with the fact that I'm tired all the time, or if its to do with how I am being labeled 'Ethiopian malnourished child' (yes, really) and actually feeling it to quite an alarming extent, or because I have been watching an overdose of Breaking Bad and can't see even with my glasses/lenses (hence, the world seems fuzzy), or because the trip I had to literally beg (for months) to get permission for might actually not be happening. Whatever is it though, it's turning me into a Grinch of sorts. One that is feeling all anti-holiday-ey. And devious. Not to mention how I'd sail through to first position, rather effortlessly, and get the gold medal+other goodies for being Miss Snappy.
All in all, December is not looking promising. And that's just such a waste of an exciting month.

December is here.
Although, it doesn't feel like it yet. Needless to say, it's my favorite month. For one there is Christmas- Carols, Ginger bread cookies, Christmas trees with shiny and frosted thingamajigs, the snow (for those who are lucky enough), oh and the wine, how could I forget? Then there is New Years Eve (which is a movie too, I hear) and the fact that another year is coming to an end. Usually, I look forward to a new year, however this time it just means '2012' is a day closer. To say it more simply, I do not wish to die in some huge 'end of the world' massacre. Anyway, before I kill the festive spirit, I will go on. In addition to all this, there is a Wedding (December weddings are the best. I'm going to have one myself). And it's in Bombay. And I'm going to dance at another Sangeet! Then there is the 23rd. The night that came and made my whole year. Annnd, the cherry on the cake, Goaaaa.
What with all of the above, beats me how it doesn't feel December-ish yet.

'I had a terrible day'- we say it all the time. A fight with the boss, a stomach flu, traffic- that's what we describe as terrible, when nothing terrible is happening. These are the things we beg for- a root canal, an I.R.S.audit, coffee spilled on our clothes. When the really terrible things happen we start begging to the God we don't believe in to bring back the little horrors and take away this. It seems quaint now doesn't it? The flood in the kitchen, the poison oak, the fight that leaves you shaking with rage. Would it have helped if we could see what else was coming? Would we have known those were the best moments of our life?
-Grey's Anatomy.

'Every organization must think the unthinkable or expect the unexpected, and prepare an emergency plan  for implementation as and when a crisis occurs.' Every time I read that in my PR text book, I'm reminded of me. I'm the organization of course, ready and waiting for my company (which, you guessed it, is my life) to crumble around me.
Yes, my crisis management committee comprises of just one person: me. Call me a pessimist, but I've learnt that 'too good to be true' is just a phrase. Today, you might have stability, trustworthy employees, profits that are soaring, maybe a good old teak desk you dream of when you're back home and lying in bed. However, the next day, who knows? What is the guarantee? That's where crisis management comes into play. You 'expect the unexpected, the unthinkable'. You look for every little sign of instability (even if it's at the lowest level),  you learn to be skeptical of your employees because who is to say they won't stray, you try and stay grounded even when you know your business is envied and you buy another teak desk, just in case. Over time, skepticism starts becoming involuntary, almost second nature. You want assurance and promise, both of which cannot be given per se. You are so wrapped up in your 'crisis management' business, it's like you're almost waiting for something to happen.
Now that, my friend, is when you know you're in serious trouble. Today, I'm standing here with all my doubts and insecurities and wondering 'when the hell did I get here?' It's like everytime one of my employees gets up and walks towards the coffee machine, I catch up with him in a flash and say 'you're leaving? How could you?' And he looks at me all aghast and says 'uh? I'm just getting a coffee'. I know I'm being obsessive and scrutinizing every little thing, and as hard as it is to admit, I feel like one of those horrible bosses bordering on senile.


And that's really starting to scare me.